Sunday, May 13, 2012

thoughts on mother's day..

about a week ago i wrote about my 'terrible, awful, very bad, not good day.'  one of my friends texted me after reading it laughing and saying that she had just had one of those days to and was so glad to laugh at mine.  Ahhh... it feels good to laugh.  Today, thank God hasn't been 'one of those days,' just kind of normal but i have been thinking about motherhood {because of the obvious holiday coming up} and how motherhood is... 'a beautiful, messy, exhausting, wonderful, down-right incomparable job.'  so here are my thoughts about mother's day...

first time looking at carter jude.
beautiful.  most of the young moms out there may be thinking, i smell from my record of not showering this week and my kids just dumped their whole plate of food on the floor... i don't know what kind of beautiful you are talking about.  yes, motherhood is messy... believe me, i'll get to that, i've got a great soap box i can stand on for about an hour to talk about messes but back to beauty... remember the first time you see that baby... you've just pushed and pushed or for some people they are half drugged up... but your doctor hands this little helpless infant that you've thought about, dreamed of, hoped for in your longing arms.  Gosh, i'm almost getting teary-eyed thinking about it.  Or those times when they look at you with longing eyes because they're sleepy or sick or injured and just want YOU.  Or those times when they get up at a church or school event to sing a song and they are wildly waving at you and they don't know the words or motions to the song but they just look so darn cute.  those are beautiful moments. 

sick little man wanting lucky me:)
messy.  gosh this is messy... quite literally and then just relationally.  i mean the messes we clean up... i am guessing God allows these messes to keep us humble because they sure do for me... i don't think i am anything in the realm of awesome when i am cleaning pee from a car seat, puke from sheets and bumpers, crusted fruit on my floorboards... and then i've heard and vaguely remember that it goes to their room: you can't even walk in their rooms because american girl dolls are having tea parties and legos need to stay on display. then the jr. high eras of clothes everywhere because they can never find the right outfit... oh the drama.  later on it gets into relationally messy (so i've heard) that the discipline is pretty much over but the training and discipling them into being people in the real world... it just is messy... but it keeps us humble.
enjoying ice cream
exhausting.  sometimes, i'm not gonna lie, i look jealously into the eyes of my babysitters who are tired from school, sports, and other activities but who are leaving my house and about to head home for a whole night of sleep.  we're so at the point of bonkers for sleep that we just purchased a clock {of some amazing inventor} where it turns to a new picture so that our first born stays in bed til a certain time.  Not just sleep but the daily grind of discipline... i get tired of saying no, and redirecting and of breaking up sibling rivalry... it's just down right tiring.  I hear too from my friends with older kids that it gets less physically exhausting when their kids get slightly older but more emotionally exhausting... although sleep trumps a lot at this season in life i know that the emotionally exhausting is just that and is not an easy season in the least. sometimes i wish we could stay worrying about these trivial issues of kids getting out of bed too early.  motherhood is exhausting.
at carter's dedication.. i think this displays my point;)
wonderful.  the 'i love you's' and the pictures and hilarious sayings and the bringing out of their personalities... from their first smile to seeing their anticipation rise when they have desperately waited for something or when they get your approval on something they worked so hard on... it's a wonderful thing.

 and lastly.... it's a down-right incomparable job.  if i'm being totally honest there are days that i think, 'if i got paid for this job, it would be a lot...' but that's not reality and that's ok.  Truly these kids are gifts.  There are moms who are doing it alone for various reasons, working moms who deserve trophies and there are stay at home moms who are just desperate for a night out....yes, we talk about how we can't wait to be away from them but when we aren't with them we talk about them the whole time... its constant because our hearts can't be the same after we are touched by these messy, little, wonderfully cute hands, faces, & hearts that exhast us and make our lives so much better.  thank you to all the mom's ... my mom, my mother-law (who raised my wonderful husband) and all the other moms who are an example to me... you are a blessing.

happy mother's day,
me and my momma

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